Monday, April 30, 2007

Overheard at law school

A lot of these overheard websites have cropped up. For your enjoyment I submit: overheard at law school.

Overheard in: Women's Restroom

Lawgirl#1, running up to Lawgirl#2 and grabbing her left hand: "Oh my gosh let me see! Oh, it's so pretty congratulations."

Lawgirl#2 staring thoughtfully at her engagement ring: "Yeah, but it's really distracting during finals."

Sunday, April 29, 2007

Kiss your guns goodbye?

I'm from the part of the country where most every law abiding citizen owns a gun. (I suppose most criminals own guns in every area of the country.) My father is a long time member of the NRA and you could say that most of the people in my family take their Second Amendment rights pretty seriously. You could also say that is a bit of an understatement.

It's hard to ignore what has been going on with guns lately. A string of shootings- CNN HQ, Virginia Tech, NASA, and now Kansas City. I'm betting that gun control enthusiasts will be out in droves. Added to that, the most vocal supporter of gun ownership is getting a little old to be waving rifles over his head. Is the day really coming where we will give up our guns?

I have to say that I believe in the right to bear arms. I also believe that the absense of a waiting period for guns in Virginia is unacceptable. I don't know if concealed to carry permits make us safer. I do know we would probably be safer without any guns whatsoever. But we do not live in a world of all or nothing and as long as the possiblity exists that one person might have a gun illegally, the argument exists that we would be safer if we were all allowed to have them.

When it comes down to it, a determined killer will find a way to take lives. If the V Tech shooter was determined to do what he did, he would not have let the absense of legally available firearms stop him. He bought his weapons over thirty days before the shooting, if a waiting period had been in place he would likely have been undetered. He was a determined killer.

It is so very (physically) easy to take a life. In a way, it's surprising that it doesn't happen more often. Most of us live in harmony every day never even thinking of hurting one another past, perhaps, a pop in the nose with a fist. When someone enters into the decision to take lives the means of execution is a formality. It's the decision we should watch out for.

Shifting the Burden

In law one party always bears the burden of proof. For example, in most criminal cases the prosecution has the burden of proving beyond a reasonable doubt that the person accused of the crime is guilty. In some circumstances the burden of proof can be shifted from the orginal party who bore it to the opposing party. When this occurs we generally say that the burden has been shifted.

It occurs to me that some people get through life only by shifting their burdens to other parties. I'm referring to tangible burdens such as duties or tasks, but also intangibles such as blame and responsiblity. What about emotional burdens? Did it ever occur to you that some people try to shift their emotional burdens onto others? Burdens such as pain, sorrow, worry, stress, ect.

I refer to those people who must constantly lament their troubles. Those who are forever complaining to others. Aren't these people trying to shift their burdens? Aren't they also those most likely to be shifting their duties on another occasion?

There is certainly nothing wrong with utilizing the shoulder of a friend or seeking advice. However, there is a line between lending a shoulder and lending a back. Some people want us to carry them. They want us to take on burdens we have no ownership over and, worse, they see it as our duty. Building up oneself by breaking down others is unacceptable. And doesn't it just break us down to be the recipient of a neverending diatribe of someone else's misfortunes? So if you bear a burden, bear it yourself and do not shift it to others. We are your friends, not your trash receptacles.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007


So ER has this commercial right now and of course it is all dramatic and shit. Whatever ER, after fifty-bazillion seasons even saving lives gets a little hum-drum. Not the point though. The reason this commercial is ridiculous is because right at the end it says, "All new episodes until the end of the season." No shit ER? You are going to show episodes until you stop? That is brilliant, thanks for informing me. Sheesh.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

You are IN

Television Without Pity has a poll up that purposes the MOST AWESOME idea I have ever heard. Are you ready for it? Anna Wintour as a judge on Project Runway. Wouldn't that be the greatest event in television history? It should be the one where they have to make dresses out of plants or maybe the haute couture challange. Oh, who am I kidding...she should be a judge on every episode. I will never be able to enjoy Project Runway again b/c I will just be thinking how much better it would be with Anna Wintour.

What about Tom Cruise on The Apprentice or Sharon Stone on Flavor of Love? Or they could bring back that Fox show that put couples on an island to break them up and put Shanna Moakler and Travis Barker on there. Now that I would watch.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Avril Lavigne has made me see the light...

Are you scared yet? I'm one of those music fans who complains when artists change their sound. A really extreme example of this would be Nelly Furtado...I have LOTS of issues regarding the progression of her music. But through Avril Levigne I have had a 'come to Jesus moment' and I will stop my complaining. Why? Because Avil Lavigne is what happens when artists do not change their sound. Need I say more?

Monday, April 16, 2007

Story of a Monday

I wonder how this story will be told. There can be no doubt that it will be a tragedy. Yet even the saddest most tragic story has light and dark.

There will be victims. In death these victims will be pure. Cherubs pulled down from the skies before their time was spent. They are casualties of the deep dark places of life that mostly stay hidden. Through the story we will peek in, get a glimpse of these places-the endless holes of life's brutality.

The heart of the villan will be a place of much interest. Yet we will step away quickly. The endless darkeness is too chilling for a stare. At a glance we will see too much of what scares us about the world, and perhaps we will see a little too much of ourselves.

Besides victims and villans, there will be heroes. Their brightness will turn these brutal holes to shadows. Oh, I wonder who will be the heroes of this story? Who are these heroes that allow us to see ourselves reflected in the light in their eyes rather than the shiny black spaces of evil? Heroes allow us to go on.

In the end both the light and dark will dimish back into natural light. The story is told but not quite spent. The last page turned but the words kept locked in some corner of our minds. We never quite forget a tragedy.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

It's weird how people have dreams...

Ever see the celebrity telling kids that *my dreams came true so can yours*? Ignoring the obvious fallacy in logic, is this not the biggest bunch of bullshit you have ever heard? The thing is...people tell you that you can do whatever you want when you are a kid. When I was a kid I thought I was going to go to Harvard. I went to a small private university with less students than my high school that my dad had attended roughly 25 years earlier. I was going to be #1 in my lawschool class, I'm not even #100. Life is damn disappointing people.

Maybe it's important to tell kids they can reach their dreams so they will be confident and happy and they will actually try to accomplish things. However I do think that when we all turn 25 and realize we are not, in fact, going to be the next Britney Spears that she should personally apologise for misleading us. We can't all be famous, influential and "great." Not even most of us can be these things. We can be good at something. We can be influential to someone. We can make a small mark on our part of the world, but most will not become infamous.

It's kind of hard to realize early in life that you are not where you pictured when you were 10 years old. Still, it's easier than continuing to believe you can make all your dreams come true and figuring out at forty that you can't. But back to the first point. In the beginning we believe that we can make it because others have before us. Those few that do, and tell others they can too, are true dreamers. They are the dreamers that still believe at forty when everything told them to quit at twenty-five. So we are left with this: 1% of true dreamers reach their own personal stars, but 99% don't. Therein lies the problem. For the chance to be part of the great 1%, you must risk being one of the disappointed 99%.

Friday, April 06, 2007

The law school admissions essay I should have written...

I was looking back over my law school admissions essay (personal statement). I'll spare you the details, but it got me to thinking about what I should have said to impress law school officials (now having two years of experience under my belt.) I present to you...the law school admissions essay I should have written:

I am most certainly the type of person who belongs in law school. I find nothing more enjoyable than reading material of absolutely no interest to me all day every day. I am incredibly fascinated by legal cases. I never tire of reading pages and pages of facts I will never need again just to discover a miniscule rule of law. I am at my best when mercilessly bombarded with complex questions in front of large groups of people with no notice.

I love to write exactly what you tell me to write in the exact order you tell me to write it in the exact format and language you desire. Research is my true passion. I could literally shred tears of joy at the prospect of rummaging through caselaw in an attempt to find a rule or precedent that in all likelihood does not exist.

I enjoy conforming to stereotyped ideas of what individuals in a certain profession should be. I only wear black suits with blue or white shirts and sensible shoes. I have no interests outside of the law. My best attributes are that I am hard-working, detail-oriented and a quick learner. I desire nothing more to recite this mantra over an over.

Most of all, above all the items listed above, I love to network. I dream about networking at night and wake up in the morning ready to network. My mouth has the permanent taste of someone else's ass. I am the true definition of a real go-getter.

So you see law school, you have no choice but to admit me. I am the perfect law student specimen. Thank you for your consideration I look forward to hearing from you.

Best regards.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

To be fair...

...Keith Richards' publicist says that he was not being serious when he said he snorted his father.

To which I say: I could see how something like that could just slip out.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

When I die for the love of God do not snort me!

Okay first read this.

So to summerize Keith Richards snorted his dad's ashes with some blow. Let's take a moment and absorb.

Not being one to experiment with drugs I am unsure of the exact amounts of cocaine use it would take to think up this touching tribute. Maybe it was meant to be an homage to the fleeting nature of life, and highs. Maybe Keith was making some kind of social-political statement about the composition of drugs. Maybe he's out of his ever lovin' mind. The last is certainly probable.

My question is...What did he do with the rest of the ashes? A little in his coffee? Perhaps the morning eggs (or should I say mourning eggs?) Daddy chip cookies? Extremely 'special' brownies? Daddy with the laundry detergent...well it could go on and on really.

I bet Mr. Richards would have settled for the beach or the sea as his final resting place. Hell, even a nice Margarita on the that's an afterlife!