Attention all people with WiFi headsets for your mobile phone:
You are not that damn important!
What, do you need your hand free to carry a human heart? A biochemical weapon (like in The Rock)? The fate of the free world? No tool! You just want your hands free so you can gesture wildly and look like even more of an ass. "Ugh, these voices in my head are driving me CRAZY!"
Stop it!
You are also making the rest of us look like idiots. We, stupidly, think you are talking to us instead of thin air. We have entire conversations with you that make absolutely no sense before we realize you are busy having some uber-important conversation about how jiggly Jello is.
Now get that damn thing out of your ear!
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