Thursday, January 12, 2006

Top Ten Reasons Why Abortion is the Biggest Issue Facing Supreme Court Nominees

10. It's the easiest way the democratic party could think of to harpoon Bush's nominees (and you know the number one mission of the democrats is to stop anything and everything Bush attempts to do regardless of what it is).

9. It's the only issue facing the nominees that the ignorant American public gives a rats ass about and/or understands.

8. Because women have the right to chose (especially the mistresses of all of Washington's finest).

7. Because a pro-life standpoint is the surest indicator of biggoted, gun-loving, religious right southern bumkin.

6. Because non-issues are the most fun to argue about.

5. Because there is no right answer (see "honey do I look fat in this").

4. Because the pool for "who can make the nominee's wife cry first" was up to 500 dollars.

3. No one likes an unborn fetus with rights (much like no one likes a feminist...hmmm ironic).

2. Because Roe v. Wade was the turning point for the court's constructing social morality through legal decisions and we all wish that the Supreme Court would make all of our decisions (would make that pesky vote counting thing so much easier).

1. SAMUEL ALITO IS GAY.

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